The Hours Of My Life

There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle, the other is as though everything is a miracle. I've no special talents. I'm only passionately curious. I'm not a woman of success, I'm a woman of value ;))) I never give up because I never fail until I stop trying...It's a life - eternal struggle....

The Hours Of My Life

Once I worked hard and thought a lot but I never got tired; now I do nothing and think of nothing, but I'm tired in body and spirit.With a heavy head, with a slothful spirit, exhausted, overstretched, broken, without faith, without love, without a goal, I roam like a shadow among men and I don't know who I am, why I'm alive, what I want. And I now think that love is nonsense, that embraces are cloying, that there's no sense in work, that song and passionate speeches are vulgar and outmoded. And everywhere I take with me depression, chill boredom, dissatisfaction, revulsion from life... I am destroyed, irretrievably!

Monday, 15 February 2021

Ima suza koje uranjaju u zemlju i niču u drugim predelima kao nebeska tela. Da li je iko oplakao naše zvezde? Ali ja tragam za svojim suzama u tmini drugih nebesa...

 


Kada čujem tišinu stvari, spoznajem samoću. Tada shvatim da svaki predmet diše, tajna carstva u kamenu a probuđena u biljci, čudesni ili očigledni ritam bića. Svi predmeti imaju svoj govor, koji dešifrujem u jednistvenoj tišini. Kad god se vreme zaustavlja, a savest se iscrpljuje u percepciji prostora, elejsko stanje me  savladava a okamenjenost stvari poništava sećanja u večnom trenutku. 

Upirem pogled ka svemu a sve je, čini se, nepotrebno i beskrajno čekanje..., do te mere se prostor smestio u moju dušu.  Prostorna iskušenja su lahor za nepokretno. Slast samoće rađa "manastirski apsolut", rastrzanu žudnju da se duša sahrani. Reči se ne čuju u spokojstvu misli. Htela bih da se istopim u suzi u kojoj je sunce zaustavilo svoje zrake, i da se isplačem na kraju svetlosti...

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